


in total darkness i reach out and touch

by kingsolace



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Mythology, Alternate Universe - Percy Jackson Fusion, Camp Half-Blood (Percy Jackson), Comfort, Demigods, Getting Together, Greek Mythology - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Mythology References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-10 06:39:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18654970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingsolace/pseuds/kingsolace
Summary: Changbin, the son of Hades, has ventured through the most perilous undertaking that Camp Half Blood has ever had in their record through its centuries of ceaseless hero quests. Together with Chan, the son of Zeus, and Jisung, the son of Poseidon, the children of the Big Three brandished themselves as 3racha as they defeated Ouranos’ himself, the personification of the sky that was dormant for plenty of millennia.And so when 3racha finally came home, Felix – the son of Apollo – immersed himself in making sure that Changbin will not leave his sight until he fully recuperates from all the trauma inflicted upon him. It turns out that despite all the horrid things Changbin had to go through, evading the persistent ruler of cabin six who won’t seem to let him out of the infirmary would be the hardest quest of them all.





	1. i. night is young and we're living

**Author's Note:**

> hi yes this is a camp-half blood au AND this is kind of parallel to solangelo since i really love my kids so much and i thought will and nico's characters would go so well with felix and changbin :,D this is my first time writing a changlix fic so pls be nice to me.
> 
> also the title was from troye sivan's touch bc im gay and yall cant stop me

The war was over.

 

After the blood-curdling day that seemed to have stretched for eternity, the heroes of Camp Half Blood and the gods of Mount Olympus could finally lull themselves to rest. The mirthful screams of the triumphant demigods reverberate to the entirety of the place and the world itself shook in tremor – and this time, no longer out of Gaia’s vengeful movements nor of Ouranos’ insurmountable wrath, but of the shared gaiety that the victors of the war have brought out in this world.

 

The demigods of the camp were cheering for 3racha – the three demigods whose godly parents were that of the Big Three – who ventured on the most perilous of circumstances only for the whole world to finally regain its peace and to drive out Ouranos himself, the vile god of the sky who was already once expunged to the face of the Earth but was driven back by inconspicuous worshippers with the dire intent to get rid of the deities residing in Mount Olympus.

 

Right after Chan – the son of Zeus – took what remained of his control on the air and plunged the scythe that Kronos once used from Gaeia’s creation on the sky, the entire heavens trembled and signified that the depraved soul who once took dominion of it now ceases to be present. Jisung – the son of Poseidon – passed out right after overexerting himself as he lifted the entire body of water that surrounds their area to make it clash with the sky that had been dooming them earlier. The scythe that Chan held was no longer in his possession as Changbin – the son of Hades – took it out of his grip and shadowtravelled somewhere nobody knew of.

 

Felix was alarmed and deeply perturbed by that. He knew the consequences entailed by shadowtravelling, and Changbin has been excessively using that ability of his since the beginning of the day as everyone was fighting some of the creatures that once sprung from Ouranos’ ichor blood when he was first slain by Kronos.

 

Right after a few seconds, there was a thick darkness enveloping someone on a tree nearby. Felix rushed after the tree and there he saw Changbin embraced by utter darkness that he can barely see the boy. Felix tried to reach for him, but his hands only passed through the boy’s body.

 

Felix’s entire body grew cold with the sudden trepidation that arose in him. He tried to reach for the boy again, and this time, he was so grateful that he could finally feel Changbin’s body. He lifted the boy in his arms and hurriedly brought him to the infirmary.

 

* * *

 

“No, not again,” Changbin screamed, his voice heavily tinged by agitation as he was basked in a place where only darkness prevailed – there was nothing. Nothing but the dark. He tried to reach for something, for anything, but everything was just pitch black and empty.

 

Changbin didn’t know what was happening, but he knew there were tears streaming down his eyes.

 

A few seconds of total dread had gone by, and then there were finally shades of light slowly illuminating the place he was in.

 

Then a voice came.

 

* * *

 

 

“Changbin, hey, are you okay?” Felix asked worriedly as he carefully shook Changbin’s shoulders incessantly. Changbin looked so distraught with the way he repeatedly mumbled “no” as his face scrunched up. Felix inched closer to Changbin until his face was just a few centimeters away from the other.

 

Changbin opened his eyes slowly, adjusting from the sudden surge of light that came into his view. His heart throbbed twice its normal pace as he said his first word the moment he finally regained enough strength, “Freckles.”

 

Felix chuckled, remembering the encounter they had earlier that day when Changbin shadowtravelled to their direction to help them defeat a monster that attempted to destroy The Big House.

 

“Yes, Changbin, it’s me. Freckles boy,” Felix lightheartedly responded. He went back to his seat next to Changbin’s bed in the infirmary as he looked at the other boy intently. “And just as I have promised you in the field earlier, I would bring your ass here in the infirmary because it seemed like you needed rest. And you do. A lot of it, actually.”

 

Changbin glared at him in an attempt to intimidate the boy despite his blatant exhaustion. “I could literally crush you right now.”

 

Felix smiled and slightly patted Changbin’s head. “I’m sure you can, big boy. But you’d have to fully recuperate to do that.”

 

“I don’t need to do anything, Freckles, I need to--”

 

“It’s Felix. And what do you need to do, Changbin? Brood and indulge in how edgy you are as you become one with the dark?” Felix playfully teased which earned him a fiery death glare from the other boy. Changbin huffed and tried to stand, but Felix only held his arm and gently pushed him back to the bed.

 

“Changbin, hey, I’m serious,” Felix said, his face now stern. He didn’t let go of Changbin’s arm as he continued, “You – you were almost gone earlier. I was so scared. When I saw you next the tree and I could barely put my hands on you, I thought you were gone for good. You overused your ability, and I’m scared that the next time you shadowtravel, you might just not make it anymore. You have to rest.”

 

Changbin couldn’t bring himself to look at the genuine concern painted on the boy’s face, so he simply looked away. He sighed and spoke, “Why do you care so much, Felix? What’s important is that we were able to save the world and get rid of Ouranos, we no longer have anything to lose.”

 

Felix brushed his hand on Changbin’s cheek toward his own direction so that they’d be facing each other again.

 

“That’s not true, Changbin. We will lose you. And you belong here. With us. Regardless of how detached you feel with your people here in the camp, you are just as much of a valued demigod here as any of us. You’re with us – always.” Felix did not take his sight off Changbin’s eyes as he said all those, making sure his message was sent across effectively. He placed his hand on top of Changbin’s and proceeded, “Now you better start sleeping and recovering your energy before I crush your ass.”

 

Changbin closed his eyes and let himself smile. His heart warmed with a sensation he has never been able to give himself the luxury of feeling before. He drifted back to sleep, now with an ease unparalleled to that of anything else’s.

 

* * *

 

 

Felix has managed to fall asleep in his seat with his head leaned on the bed where Changbin was in. He was, however, woken with the sudden absence of warmth in the bed where his head happened to lie on and the creaking of the wood on the room’s floor made by a few footsteps. He immediately turned his head from the source of the noise and darted his eyes to Changbin who was trying to grab the door’s handle.

 

“Where do you think you’re going, Death Boy?” Felix asked, his tone infuriated. He squinted his eyes that were barely opened yet at the boy who was trying to evade clinic time.

 

“To hell, apparently,” Changbin deadpanned. Felix sighed exasperatedly.

 

“You aren’t fully recovered yet, Changbin. You barely have any strength to perform mundane tasks. And for all I know, seeing as how obstinate you are, you will be over-exerting yourself again.”

 

Changbin held his hands up in concession. “Freckles, I’ll just go out for a while to check on my friends. I’d like to be assured that Jisung and Chan are doing good. You couldn’t have it in your conscience to deprive a guy from doing such altruistic deeds to his friends, now, would you?”

 

Felix raised his eyebrows and stood up.

 

“If I find out you’ve used any of your abilities for anything stupid, you wouldn’t even hear the end of it.”

 

Changbin mocked salute and turned back. Before he could grab for the handle and head out, Felix stopped him by faking a cough.

 

“What is it this time?” Changbin asked, pretending to be pissed.

 

“No compensation for the doctor, Changbin? Not even a kiss on the cheek?” Felix teased and winked. Changbin flustered and seem to have lost the strong boy facade he has been masking on himself since earlier. Felix was amused by the reaction so he pushed the ordeal.

 

“Don’t tell me Mr. Death Boy is too afraid to give out some kiss for his very compassi–” Felix was cut off by Changbin suddenly disappearing in the dark.

 

Felix rolled his eyes and groaned in frustration. “I told him he shouldn’t shadowtravel. That little–”

 

He was cut off, once more, by Changbin suddenly appearing on his side. The older inched his face closer to Felix and kissed his cheek just as he requested. Felix physically felt his blood rise to his cheeks. His eyes widened and he seemed to freeze in his place. Clearly, he didn’t think this though.

 

Changbin smirked for the first time since Felix had seen him and muttered, “See you later, Freckles.”

 

Changbin was already gone yet Felix’s hand was still stuck on his own cheek as he tried really hard to process everything that had just occurred in the past few minutes. He smiled on his own and shook his head.


	2. ii. glow is low and it's dimming

The morning dawned a tinge of complacency sprawled across the expanse of the sky as the sun painted the heavens in such heightened vibrance that the people of Camp Half Blood haven’t seen for months. Most of the demigods, though, missed the glaring display of that scenery for they remain to be tucked in their slumber, compensating for the exhaustion that has depleted them from the battle with Ouranos.

 

The water in the canoe lake glistened and bursted with life, its constant ripples a reminder of the countless souls that reside there. Changbin inhaled deeply, and the trees that encompass the area seemed to have swayed in anticipation as the boy ensconced himself on the grasses. He wrapped his legs around his arms and rested his chin on his knees.

 

Changbin barely slept last night because he was tugged with the incessant fear of having to be trapped in absolute darkness again. He thought that it was funny how his entire character was built upon being dark, and how everyone around him carry the impression his comfort inhibits most there when the truth is that he’d do anything to be kept out of it as much as he could. His own shadows terrified him.

 

His brooding was perturbed by a few light taps on his shoulder. He instinctively turned around and was faced by a beaming figure whose legs were slightly bent so that their faces are leveled to each other. Changbin squinted his eyes. _Too bright,_ he thought.

 

Changbin sighed in faux annoyance and muttered, “Freckles. What do you need?”

That earned him a chuckle from the other boy. “You know, Death Boy–” he said as he sat next to Changbin and slightly angled his body to face the older–“it’s quite ironic that the children of Apollo have acquired freckles which is literally hyperpigmentation caused by the exposure on UV rays from the sun and my dad is literally _the_ sun so shouldn’t we, like, earn some kind of immunity from it?”

 

 _But it fits you just right,_ is what Changbin wanted to say but instead responded with, “Maybe it’s your father’s punishment for how excessively talkative you are.”

 

“Ouch,” Felix gasped and dramatically clutched his chest. He pointed at Changbin accusatorily and said, “You didn’t come back to the infirmary last night.”

 

“Really? I didn’t know that,” Changbin said, indulging Felix by heightening his sarcasm. The other boy only laughed heartily.

 

“I can’t believe you’re making me do this but you leave me with no choice.” Felix shut his eyes and motioned at Changbin. “You are to come back to the infirmary in the afternoon. Doctor’s order!”

 

Changbin rolled his eyes exasperatedly and asked, “Dude, why are you so obsessed with keeping me your prisoner in the infirmary?”

 

“Maybe because I want you there!” Felix blurted, and when he processed what he just said, his eyes widened and he was taken aback by his own words. He immediately flailed and rambled, “I mean, because I want you to heal and fully recover! The past few weeks have been taxing for you and surely you’re in ne–”

 

“I get it, Felix. I’ll be there,” Changbin interrupted, and deep inside, continued with _I want to be there too._

 

“Good. Also, have you really spent so much of your time staring at the lake when you could use the boat right over there and enjoy the utter magnificence of the scenery? Do you want to go with me?” Felix said excitedly, his eyes directed to Changbin’s. The boy was making it hard for him to refuse, but he chose to stand his own ground.

 

“Felix, we aren’t just quite there yet.”

 

“Well, I’ll make sure that one day we’d ride the boat together and venture the canoe lake!”

 

“You do know, though, that the canoe lake is often a venue for dates, right?” Changbin teased. Felix flustered a deep color of red and Changbin allowed himself to laugh at that one. Felix joined him and _somehow,_ Changbin managed to _feel._

* * *

 

The Dining Pavilion was brimming with the dancing flames on the central fire kept inside the bronze brazier as they shone in an effulgence that proved to be unparalleled with the way everything seemed to have been dimmed in the past few days of the unspeakable chaos. The wind brushed thoroughly to everyone’s skin in a welcoming manner as everyone are situated on a hill overlooking the sea.

 

Everyone sat on their respective tables in accordance to their godly parent, and the pavilion was filled by muffled noises and hushes a few seconds in. Changbin sat with Chan and Jisung, the children of the Big Three gathered as they have no siblings to share their table with.

 

Jisung stuffed so much food in his mouth that Chan had to slow him down. Changbin drank the grape juice he extracted from the Pavilion's Goblet. He looked around the room and when his eyes drifted on Apollo’s table, his gaze fell on Felix’s hold who winked at him when their eyes met.

 

“How have you been doing, Changbin?” Chan asked, his voice tinged with the usual parental concern he exhibits on everyone. Changbin managed a sly smile.

  
“Better than the dead people I commune with on a daily basis.” Jisung chuckled and almost choked on his food.

 

“Changbin, we all know you’ve been through the most out of the three of us,” Chan said as he placed his hand on the other boy’s shoulder. “You wielded the scythe for days, and I held it for a few seconds but the trauma it inflicted upon me is horrendous. You may speak to us anytime, okay? This is not your own battle to face, you have us. Always.”

 

“Seconded!” Jisung added with his mouth full of strawberries.

 

Changbin looked down, still not used with the usual display of concern directed to him every now and then. He nodded reassuringly and went back to his drink. He truly appreciated the way both of his friends have anchored him with everything he went through, and how they never ceased to keep him in line despite the many terrible things that have shackled them in their previous quest.

 

A few minutes passed and soon enough, both Chan and Jisung have been swept away. Chan had been pulled by Woojin rather willingly, and Jisung was nagged by Athena’s cabin counselor, Minho, who demanded that he must rest. _Sounds familiar,_ Changbin thought. And just as he had brushed that idea off, Felix sat across him.

 

“You again,” Changbin said, a bite of faked disinterest and playfulness.

 

“Yes, I thought you must’ve missed me a lot already.”

 

“Why are you even here? I’m pretty sure you aren’t allowed to sit there unless of course you’re on board with the idea of opening the gates to the underworld and having my father pull your feet for sitting on the table dedicated solely for his children.”

 

“Wow. You really must’ve thought through that a lot, huh?” Felix chuckled and inched closer to Changbin. “Well, Death Boy, it just turns out I have the permission to do so. Doctor’s orders!”

 

“Really, Felix? You’re literally going to use that excuse to coerce everyone to doing what you want.”

 

“But you aren’t everyone,” Felix said solemnly. Changbin only raised his eyebrows and allowed the comfortable silence seethe through them. But, silence, of course, didn’t last long when Felix is around. He immediately sat up and rested his hand on Changbin’s shoulder.

 

“See you on the infirmary later! Don’t be too excited,” Felix said and squeezed the older’s shoulder.

 

Changbin could still feel the ghost of Felix’s hand linger on his shoulder, and he let himself engross in that moment for quite a while.

 

* * *

 

 

The Big House was dull and lifeless in its prodigious space that stretch to multiple rooms. The infirmary, however, was quite the opposite. Felix seemed to have redecorated the room so that it would be accommodating of light and the air itself cheered with an ambiance that is a hundred times more uplifting than the entirety of Hades’ cabin where Changbin usually sleeps.

 

When Changbin entered in the infirmary, he caught Felix asleep in the couch parallel to the bed where Changbin once slept on. He sat on the bed and looked at the boy sleeping right in front of him. He noticed how extremely peaceful Felix looked while asleep, and how his hair that seemed to be very soft brushed against his own forehead. And for the last while, he noticed how prominent the boy’s freckles were and how willingly he would trace them and mold his own shapes as the boy’s face itself paints of an art that Changbin won’t replace for anything else.

 

He wished his face weren’t as warm as it felt when he realized how intrusive he must’ve been, so he looked away and inhaled deeply. From his peripheral view, he noticed that Felix shifted. He grunted softly and opened his eyes slowly. “Death boy?”

 

Changbin only huffed, which was enough to grant a smile on Felix’s face.

 

“Have you been here long? Were you staring at my face?” Felix joked, but Changbin blushed. He was thankful that the younger was barely awake and had his eyes half open to witness the mess that he wreaked upon Changbin.

Changbin chose to finally lay on the bed and faced Felix. The other boy yawned and picked up a chair to place directly right in front of Changbin. He smiled and grab the older’s hair to caress it _once._

 

Changbin’s eyes widened in shock by the unexpected gesture. “What the hell did you just do?”

 

“It seemed soft & fluffy. So I went for it. And I was right!”

 

Changbin was envious of how easy it was for Felix to do what he pleased. Because if he was also bold in his gestures, he would’ve long patted Felix’s head already and cupped his cheeks and traced the freckles that spread over his face an–

 

Changbin stopped himself before he spiral any further on his train of thought he shouldn’t have indulged in the first place. Instead, he just let Felix’s hand rest on his hair.

 

“Come to think of it, I don’t know much about you yet!” Felix exclaimed.

 

“As I do, too, Felix. You were just the one barging in on me as if we have been friends our entire life,” Changbin said, and thought, _not that I mind._

 

“I want to fight you on that one, but I’m afraid you’re right. However, I know just the right way to change that!” Felix excitedly leaped and smiled ear-to-ear.

 

“If you even suggest a question and answer, I will seriously go on a death trance right at this very moment.”

  
Felix ignored his remark and thundered, “A question and answer!”

 

“I will maim you.”

 

“Now, now, drama boy, you have to stop acting all dark on me because I know for a fact that you’re a giant ball of sunshine trapped in a tiny brooding body.”

 

They proceeded with the segment despite Changbin’s constant protests and reluctance. Later on, Changbin found himself genuinely enjoying the game and warming to Felix’s smiles and cute banter. He found himself truly engulfed in the light that Felix seemed to have effortlessly shared between the two of them. He found himself sincerely interested not only in engaging with Felix’s life, but to also sharing bits of his own to the other boy.

 

Sleep that night went easy, and for the first time after countless days of dwelling with his own mind, he felt his heart lull at ease.

 

* * *

 

Morning came and he was woken by the smell of freshly cooked breakfast and coffee served right in front of him. Felix brought it to him together with his own food so that they may eat together and passed through the pavilion with the tray without any question because apparently they are, once more, _doctor’s orders._ Conversation flowed way easier between the two of them, this time with their exchanges being led by the once taciturn Changbin more often than not. Changbin also stayed in the infirmary throughout the day even though he barely had any reason to do so. Felix was tending to injured demigods every now and then, and Changbin found himself greatly captivated with the way Felix brought so much comfort among those whom he provided service to.

 

This practice went on for about four days, until it just became a thing of mundanity for both Changbin and Felix, refusing to question the habit they have seemingly fallen into. A week into it, Changbin decided to bring the notion up to Felix.

 

“Hey, Felix, do you mind that I’ve been spending too much time here in the infirmary? You can be completely honest to me.”

 

Felix shook his head and smiled, “No, Changbin. I’m pretty sure you still need plenty of rest, so stay here as long as you’d like.”

 

They both know Changbin no longer needed rest, but once more, neither of them questioned it.

 

“Also, if it isn’t too meddlesome, I’ve noticed that you’re somewhat distant to the campers here? I mean, of course, you aren’t obliged to be super close with anyone but I feel like you are still carrying something you’ve always had inside you and. . . we’re friends, right? You can talk to me about it.”

 

Changbin knew Felix only intend the best for him, and that he will listen to him regardless of anything. Changbin also knew that he can trust Felix as their previous encounters shown how much Felix would only do good for him, and how badly Changbin will do the same for him. Somehow, Changbin was now flooded with the desire to _tell_ contrary to the way he always seemed to have been caged in his own restraint of keeping everything to himself.

 

And so with a deep breath, he spoke.

 

“Well, uh, I never really felt like I belong, you know? And I never felt the need to prove that I do, anyway. People always have this impression on me that since I am a child of Hades, I ought to be very scary and really unapproachable and I guess, in some way, it became a self-fulfilling prophecy so I just refuse to open up to anyone before they realize they don’t want to be with me, after all. I went through Khaos itself as I retrieved the scythe and held it for days, constantly on a dwell with insanity. But I couldn’t drop it, because then, I would’ve trashed all the efforts I went through delving into the Underworld consulting the likes of Nyx just to get to the primordial place of literally _nothingness._ I was constantly reminded of how growing up, I was antagonized to be a person that no one would ever want to be with.

 

And, I guess, that idea just stuck to me. The way it was highlighted on those painful nights dwelling with my own in absolute darkness really did a number on me. If it weren’t for Chan and Jisung, I would’ve been consumed by Khaos and just. . . completely disappear as if I didn’t exist to begin with.”

 

Before Changbin could say more, Felix abruptly held him on a tight hug and softly stroked his hair, consoling him. Changbin had been successful in suppressing his tears when he was speaking, but when Felix held him in his own arms, he completely lost all hold on his own emotions and just broke down. Something he always _needed_ to do.

 

Felix let him cry on his shoulders, and once he was finally able to calm himself down, he pulled Changbin’s face a few inches on his own and cupped his cheeks. Felix looked him directly in his eyes and uttered, “The difference now, Changbin, is you no longer have to dwell in that darkness alone. I am here for you to reach out on whenever you feel like you’re being swallowed by it again. Khaos itself wouldn’t stand a chance if I decide to kick its ass. You belong here. Always. Don’t forget that.”

 

Felix brought his face closer to his own, and kissed his forehead. “You belong here.”

 

Changbin closed his eyes and imbibed the words. “I belong here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments and kudos are highly appreciated! hope you enjoyed :)


	3. iii. and the time is moving slower (i can feel us getting closer)

The days that followed were nothing short on bliss, and Changbin was finally able to get himself out of the infirmary  – by choice, and with Felix. He didn’t think a day would come when he’d willingly expose himself to the sun and the wonders brought upon meandering in the wide breadth of the camp’s landscape. But it did, and with it came a person that gave him more of the reason to step out of his own bubble without feeling his skin needing to crawl out of its own. 

 

Changbin was also able to start making friends with the other campers; he gamely allowed himself to converse with the likes of Jeongin  – one who’s known to be everyone’s friend  – without the lurking urge to over-analyze the things he says in the looming fear of saying something that would make them want to stop talking to him.

 

For once, Changbin believed in what Felix has already told him. He belongs here.

 

His friendliness, it turned out, actually had its limit after all. When he saw Hyunjin, the counselor of Aphrodite’s cabin, approach Felix and flirtatiously took his hand to kiss it, Changbin wasn’t able to restrain himself from darting a glare on Hyunjin’s direction. 

 

“Felix, darling, how have you been? We haven’t talked for forever!” Hyunjin motioned dramatically as he took Felix in his arms. 

 

Felix grinned and flicked Hyunjin’s forehead. “The last time we talked was literally yesterday, Hyunjin. But I can’t blame you if you missed me this much.”

 

“You make it hard for me not to miss you. Well, I’d have to be going now! See you soon on the amphitheater!” Hyunjin patted Felix’s arms and simply nodded at Changbin. He went away to approach another group of campers in a flair. 

 

“Is there something going on between the two of you?” Changbin asked, perhaps slightly aggressively. Felix lifted his eyebrow questioningly, and when he finally processed what the other boy meant, he laughed. 

 

“No, Death Boy. He literally flirts with everyone! But we all know that he’s pining over Seungmin. It’s a shame, really, that he’s a son of the goddess of love who shamelessly flirts with everyone but can’t even grow the balls to ask his crush out.” 

 

Changbin squinted his eyes suspiciously. “He flirts with everyone? Why didn’t he flirt with me, then?”

 

“Changbin, you literally looked like you were going to eat him alive. It’s not really the best fitting to flirt with someone who intends to murder you,” Felix pointed out. “Also, you may be wondering about the amphitheater thing, so let me clear this up once and for all. Minho, Hyunjin, and I meet there sometimes to practice our dancing. Actually sucks that this camp doesn’t offer dancing lessons, so we have to find ways to thrive by ourselves.”

 

“You. . . dance?” Changbin asked, amused. The boy in front of him seemed to have been blessed with everything; the gods’ favoritism truly is starting to blatantly show already. 

 

Felix only winked as a response and planted a quick and soft peck on Changbin’s cheeks. “I have to go check the infirmary now! See you whenever, Death Boy.” 

 

It was then that Changbin concluded that maybe  _ something _ , after all, is up. 

 

 

* * *

Changbin admitted that there are a lot of bad things he ought to change about himself, but being self-aware is not one of them. He knew that despite the perils of knowing something big, knowing is still better than being kept in the dark. And so when he was back on his cabin to ponder on his own and he realized he might like Felix as more than a friend, he took a few seconds to commend himself for the self-awareness and then the rest was spent on wallowing about how deep in this shit he already was. 

He already saw it coming the first time he stumbled upon Felix. But the first encounter didn’t boggle him as much  – although he conceded to the fact that Felix was his absolute type, it was rare for him to fall for someone on the mere basis of how they look. But  _ gods does he look really really good.  _ The moment he was stuck on the infirmary with Felix, however, he was both absolutely shaken and enthralled at how deep Felix’s voice is yet still heavily tinged with riveting smoothness which Changbin will never tire of hearing  _ ever.  _

 

The moment they played the stupid question & answer, though, was the biggest shift of feelings for Changbin. He tried to brush it off the first time he felt his stomach lurching upon the very sight of Felix, but it only grew and blossomed in each of the day he spent with Felix. And he found himself totally  _ fucked  _ when he no longer minded how it just ceaselessly expanded in him. Until the day came that Felix imparted upon him the words he has always been yearning for, he  _ knew  _ he had no escape in this one. 

 

And so when faced in this dire situation, he did what any other man would: he called for an emergency meeting with Chan and Jisung who were both now seated in front of him, eyes wary and suspecting.

 

“I need your help on something,” Changbin says, his voice laced with anxiety. 

 

“Did you murder someone or are you about to murder someone?” Jisung asked, genuinely curious. 

 

“No, I did not murder anyone nor am I planning to do so.”

 

“Ah, well, that sucks. I was already narrowing down the choices as to where we might dump a body in this camp.”

 

Chan lightly hit Jisung’s arm and spoke, “What happened, Changbin?”

 

“Uh, well, I think I like someone.” Changbin himself was startled at how he managed to take those words out of his system. Saying it made it feel more real, and that taunted him more. 

 

Both Jisung and Chan looked unfazed. “You mean Felix, right? That’s only normal considering how you two are already dating,” Jisung remarked.

 

Changbin dropped his jaw in shock. “First of all  – how did you know it was Felix? And no, we aren’t dating.” His shoulders sagged and muttered under his breath, “How I wish we were.”

 

“You two have literally been together for the entire week and neither of you would stop coddling each other as if someone will steal the other if left alone. Everyone noticed, Changbin. It’s a surprise that you haven’t heard anyone on the Aphrodite cabin gushing about how you two were absolute lovers,” Chan stated as a matter of fact. 

“Ah, well. What should I do?” Changbin asked, his face contorted in fear. He was so stupid and selectively indulged on Felix only to disregard what others have been saying about them. 

 

“Uh, stupid, how about tell him?” Jisung suggested, as if it was that simple.

 

“Are you kidding me? I can’t. I literally can not. If I do, he will just push me away and feel uncomfortable. I can’t risk losing him.” 

 

“Do you seriously think he doesn’t like you back? Come on, even when we are at the pavilion, you two wouldn’t stop sending heart eyes to each other!” Chan said, clearly exasperated. “Changbin, I’ve never seen you allow yourself to be this close over someone. And that says a lot; clearly, Felix has already seen you for who you are and has never even considered to leave you. If he truly is your friend, this confession wouldn’t ruin anything for the both of you. Let yourself breathe, Changbin. You deserve it.”

 

Changbin nodded and sighed, “You’re right, Chan. Thank you. As always.”

 

 

* * *

The truth was, Changbin didn’t know what he was supposed to do next. The sun was already setting as it brought the promise of nighttime, and the shadows were already growing thick surrounding the high walls of the amphitheater. Changbin could here the upbeat music playing inside which indicated that there was someone inside. There was a small part of him hoping it wouldn’t just be Felix alone so that he’d be forced to push the confession another day, but another part of him badly wanted to be with Felix alone.

 

Changbin quietly paced inside the amphitheater from the parodos and sat at the first level of the theatron. His greatest fear came into nascent. On the orchestra was Felix, alone. He didn’t even notice someone coming in because he was fully immersed in his dance  – perfectly capturing every beat and moving his body as if there was barely any disparity that separates the music from himself. He  _ embodied  _ the music he was dancing to, punctuating it with immense meaning, and Changbin was definitely spellbinded. 

 

When the music stopped, Changbin couldn’t help himself but clap. Felix turned in shock with the revelation of someone watching him, but he immediately softened when he found out it was Changbin. He cheerily ran toward Changbin’s direction and breathlessly said, “Death Boy!”

 

“Freckles,” Changbin acknowledged, still heavily fixated to the boy in front of him.

 

Felix stood confidently and turned around dramatically. “So how was it, huh? Did you fall in love with my mesmerizing figure?” 

 

“Yes,” Changbin rasped under his breath. Both him and Felix seemed to have been taken off guard. Felix tried to laugh it off awkwardly. 

 

“I have something to tell you,” Felix said, his usual confident demeanor out of the picture. He scratched the nape of his neck and looked down. 

 

“I do have something to tell you, actually, but okay, let’s see what you’ve got.” 

 

Changbin’s heart pounded frantically. He tried to stand his ground, but each second was getting harder with the heft of his secret gaining on him. 

 

“Promise this won’t change anything between us, okay? Or you’ll see how much preferable the underworld is compared to my wrath.”

 

Changbin laughed at that and the tense air that binded the two of them easily dissipated. 

 

“I promise.”

 

With that assurance, Felix managed to smile. “Well, Death Boy, it turns out I might be a little fond of you. I actually asked my dad to give me a sign whether I should confess now and challenged him that if you came here tonight, I would already confess. And quite honestly, I don’t know how to feel about the tables turning on me. So, yes, I’ve been thinking about it lately and I think . . . I knew eversince I took you in the infirmary. I’ve been interested with you since the moment you entered this camp, but I never had the courage to approach you. So when you saved us back there from that monster, I felt this need to protect you in return. You’re so painfully selfless, and I hope you know that. This is too cheesy, I’m sorry, but yes, I like your brooding ass and you just have to deal with it.”

 

Felix pretended to be composed, but Changbin could see the way his fingers trembled and his body shuddered. Changbin could now only hear his own heart pounding; the whole word seemed to have narrowed to Felix only because he was all that Changbin could seem to grasp, and his heartbeat the only sound processed in his very ears.

 

“H-Hey. Did I make you uncomfortable? Say something!” Felix panicked, repeatedly shaking Changbin’s frozen shoulders. 

 

Changbin cupped Felix’s cheeks with his own trembling hands and slurred hastily, “Can I kiss you now?”

 

Felix’s eyes widened, and when he finally made sense of Changbin’s words, he nodded  – perhaps too eagerly. 

 

And so Changbin’s lips met Felix’s, and it was everything he ever wanted  _ and more. _ There was no such thing as the world going in slow-mo, or fireworks suddenly shooting up the skies; there were only him and Felix. And that was enough.

  
When they both pulled away, they looked at each other’s eyes as if they hold everything they have always been looking for.  _ And perhaps they did.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for making it to the end!!! pls spare some thoughts < 33 hope you enjoyed it!! if you'd like to talk to me, you may do so on my twitter acc @strayroha


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